SCREW LA!

Ok.. Don't read this if you don't want to hear me vent my (older) teenage frustration.
YES, because i'm 19 and still in the 2nd decade of my life, i am ENTITLED to vent. VENT on my fucking blog. Vent vent vent!

I'm emotionally stunted. I disguise emotions through logic, intelligence and sarcasm. Deal with it!

I hate feeling emotional about things.. I HATE HATE HATE IT!

Today's my first day at SAF MDC - the most heavenly place on the SAF planet. Free and easy use of gym, pool. Early book out. Short working hours (compared to stay in). I get to sing. Its freaking SAF heaven!

YET YET YET, I'm soooooooooo freaking irritated. Not at that one person in particular. But at myself. Yes, i can't control my emotions. SOORRRYY LAA! But do you have to be so un-understanding!?!?! Sometimes a girl, i mean a guy, just needs comfort and assurance that everything will be alright... OR A FREAKING SIMPLE EXPLANATION as to why you can't call/text at night when overseas la!!!

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BRING IN, "But YOU always knew.. I told YOU that bla bla bla bla.. keep YOUR emotions in check... I NEVER do what YOU ARE doing now to YOU...". YA, you're the greatest. You're emotiopnally steady. You don't break down easily to tears or emotions. You are superior. I admit. And this is not out of spite. You can handle your emotions well enough. You have got years on me to practice that.

I'm 19. Emotionally stunted. Unsure of the boundaries of relationships. I always cross the line. I'm soooooo much better at being single. NO FREAKING hang ups. I will not be concerned about what time is sleeping time, what time to call, what to do, how to behave, how to include, how to please. I'm learning to be attached. So yes, give me some credit. Give me some advice. DOn't push me away.

Rant over.

-jho. no mood for anything but sleep.