21st: from Minor to Major

What has changed?

My signature carries legal value, I can be declared bankrupt, I can officially watch R(A) movies, I'm allowed into more clubs... Responsibility.

I'm officially my own man. Independent.

Parents, at least Chinese ones, dread this day. The day whereby we officially "chi4 bang3 ying4 le4" = "wings are hard now". The Age of Majority. How many times have I heard my mother say, "when you hit 21 then see how... when you hit 21 then you'll see.. when you hit 21...."

Well mom, 21 is 32mins away.

She just asked me, "Are you happy?", I assume about the dinner at the Brazillian place on sixth ave, the generous gift from both of them, and the ice-cream cake.

But it made me think. For a moment. Am I happy?

Yeah. I am. I may be cynical at times, jaded at most, even display traces of malcontent, but when it comes down to true happiness - yes I am.

I have what I want. Great relationship, great friendships, family trying to be as supportive as possible, good education, a well-rounded lifestyle. I am happy.

Yet, why do I feel a nagging self-doubt? Almost like I have more to prove because i'm 21; an adult. Like I can't depend on my youth to get away with as much things as I have. Really, is hitting 21 a blessing? How many times I hear people lament about their youthful days, wishing they were younger and that they can do it all over again.

I bet this is one of the more enjoyable times of my life, being an undergrad. And that I will miss it once it's over. Yes, live life to the fullest. But why do I constantly worry that I'm not. That i'm missing out. That I will regret. Paranoia?

When I was asked to make a wish at the birthday cake just, I really couldn't think of anything material to wish for. Not any new shoes, new clothes, new laptop, paid vacation. Nothing of sort. Is this adulthood? hahaha!

Beyond 21, no more "official stages" in a person's lifespan.

I am happy. I'm an adult. Jeremy has came of age. The Age of Majority. Time to live, in the real world. 5mins to adulthood.

Happy 21st Birthday Jeremy. Live well.